The Stupidest Thing You've Done on a Bike Thread.

[Mark_Able]

Right, I'll start it off with my first ever 'off'.

1981, Yamaha FS1E, two up across my old school playground, hitting a grass mound with the intention of clearing the sand pit the other side. It didn't work... :

[smellygerm]

front break on turning in to a street redlining it and running with the bike ,luckily managed to hold on and pull the clutch in but still looked like a twat :-[

[Iceman]

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[redken1]

Back in 1977 I lived in a Small village in Essex and I really had the hots for this young 16 year old girl. Off the main drag there was a residential street where all the youth of the day used to hang out. This particular evening I rode my just polished 185GT Suzuki up the main drag passing the said street corner hoping to catch a glimpse of, you guessed it, Julie. Along with a crowd, she was there. With my heart racing with passion it was time to implement my plan to woo my prospective new date. Adrenlin pumping, I turned the bike around and procceeded back down the main drag and attempted to negotiate the junction at 40 mph. Needless to say I did'nt make it and bike and I ended up in a resident's hedge opposite the laughing crowd. My plan was a part success as she ended up with wet knickers - unfortunately, not due to the exitement of seeing me, but from pissing herself laughing. Went out and got drunk with my mates that night.

[Nelly]

Back in um....god knows when, thought i could master a Honda C90. so in front of all my mates a proceeded to show them a thing or two. This culminated in me hitting a small 6in high wall. Wouldn't have been so bad but there was a 6ft drop over the other side. Headfirst over the wall, no helmet, handlebars meet face. Woke up sometime later with a headache, a broken watch and lots of faces laughing at me :

[BladeTriple]

Cold tyres, wet road in Germany thinking yeah I can get my knee down on this one threw it in slid down the road on my arse trapped under my CBR6 then followed it up the kerb on its left hand side and took both cheeks out as well as my clutch cover :-( needless to say I never tried that again

To add insult to injury I had my ex behind me calling me all the profanities in the book , yeah thanks bruised arse cheeks are enough without the torrent of abuse .... ah such fond memories of that arsehole ;D

[Richzx10r]

Couple of years ago in lynham on my way to the lysley monday night meet a car pulled out in front of me opposite the texaco garage.He(an 18 year old)was looking left and turned right.Managed to kill most of my speed but still hit him at 10mph.Fractured knee and torn quad.O and an sp2(my dream bike) written off.

[Mark_Able]

Stupid story No.2.

Again, it's the old DT175, this time versus a girl on a GSX250. Got into a bit of a race. She did some dodgy overtakes, mainly due to not knocking down gears before hand. One local bridge, well known to locals, single file traffic, traffic light controlled. Came round the corner to find a green light, went for the over take on said girl, and a box van at the same time. Doing the bridge at 30mph would get you airbourne, and I was doing about 40! Whilst mid air on the outside of the van, realised there was a car doing a right turn immediately over the bridge. Oh cock! The only solution was to turn right with the car, sort of cutting the corner. Stop just up road, take helmet off, have a fag, ask what the f**k I'm doing. As I said, my riding has improved since then...

[BB]

There we were, out in deepest ex East Germany – the Wall had been down about a year or so – only doing about 25 mph in the cold wet rain (July I think) and I was trailing along behind my late husband in the gloom on those lovely setts they used as road surfaces. He’s on a Constellation, I’m on a T100. I’m thinking ‘I’m cold, I’m wet, I’m fed up and want to stop’ He’s thinking ‘I bet she is cold, wet, fed up and wants to stop’, so he suddenly pulls over on a forecourt and I suddenly grab the front brake then think ‘Sh*t’ …

Well those of us of a certain age know how grabby Triumph twin leading shoe’s can be, couple that with nice wet setts as a road surface and down I went.

It’s surprising how well you can adapt to riding with your hands and feet at different heights because the bars and the foot peg is bent and you are some considerable distance from home!

BB

[Mark_Able]

Story No.3.

The first points I received on my licence. Pull out my girlfiends house on the DT again, straight up to 45 clicks in a 30 limit (copper following, but didn't notice), across one mini roundabout up to 50 clicks. Further along over take a car that is over taking a parked car, then straight across the middle of another mini roundabout (raised) thereby leaping it! Blue lights come on. Tries to nick me for 65 in a 30. I say it can't do that (it could, and then some). Puts me down for 50-55. 3 points. Bugger! :-/