Iceman
23-01-11, 01:23 PM
Ok,found myself a bike I wanted to buy in Pilning,Bristol. Great! Secured the deal,arranged Insurance for the bike and bought a train ticket. On arriving at Pilning I found myself in the middle of nowhere(literaly, check out Google map to see what I mean)and the chap was not answering his mobile.I thought great,I've been set up.After touring the local countryside lanes I eventualy got the seller to answer his phone.He was waiting at some other station and thought the one I was at was abandoned!lol
...anyway, got picked up eventualy,tested the bike,shook hands and made the deal permanent! I asked how much petrol was in the tank,and he said £10. Cool,I can make it to the first M5 service station. But decided to go into Bristol to the nearest petrol station just in case. So, going into Bristol,the traffic is manic(5pm) and I'm crawling along in a 3 lane approach to a roundabout.Suddenly the throttle response is gone and the bike stalls.Oh great,I thought.Out of petrol. I then discover that the bikes reserve fuel stop valve lever is missing !
So ,I try vainly to start the bike, then the battery fails! Arggh :o!! I'm knee deep,in the dark on a busy junction surrounded by cars and I need to push the bike off road across 3 lanes. Cursing I push the bike(previously felt light ,now getting heavy)down the road then I hit a hill! Struggling I slowly wheel her up the hill,round a few corners and then I see a garage! I eventualy push her into the garage forecourt soaked with sweat and breathing heavy.I fill her up to the brim. Climb back on and ........ nothing! the battery would not recover! At this point I got off the bike and walked over to the kiosk to pay for the petrol and walked back.There was this van parked behind me waiting impatiently with driver and pillock passenger!
I again tried to start the engine but to no avail so wheeled the bike forward to allow the van to use the pump behind me. Suddenly the driver hoots his horn and points to the 2nd pump.At this point out jumps the pillock passenger who starts raving and ranting like a demented wounded bear.I stood my ground and told him to cool it.I warned him to back off because he has no Idea who he's messing with.( I am an ex military unarmed combat instructor). The driver of the van then attempted to calm his irate (future heart attack victim). At this point I told him to drag the pillock away before I lose patience. The police arrive and attempt to cool things. I walk off pushing the bike to the exit and got on the phone to the seller.Naturally I was angry and said"what £10 of petrol?" and demanded he come to my aid.He said"glad he got hold of me as he's got the tax disk complete with holder! :D
while waiting for the seller to turn up the van leaves the via the service exit, by which time the subdued passenger's probably came to his senses as he failed to keep eye contact with me,probably realising he's lucky to have walked off! Anyway, he's probably got a family and kids!Absoltely pathetic and a sign of the stress that driving causes to "normal"people.
Shortly later, the seller turns up and we're pushing the bike up and down, and after 5 attempts the bike roars into life! I take the tax disk off him and put it in my pocket! I then said I'm lost so can he show me the way to the M5 junction?
No problems, and takes off in the manic rush hour traffic. I follow him and then he goes and jumps red lights!"Oh thanks mate! So, instead of waiting for me he's gone and I'm left going round the next few large roundabouts round and round and round looking for an exit that offers a glimmer of hope to where the M5 may be. I take a calculated guess and promptly head off where the traffic seems to be going and there's the glorious M5 junction. I hit the motorway and settle off for the 100 odd miles home. After half an hour I'm thinking"glad I don't live in a city with all that chaos and anger, and so glad I did not floor that wally as it would have meant me having to return for a court appearance and I'm sqeaky clean! :)
Shortly after I realise that my gloves were never designed for this extreme cold and I lose all feeling in my fingers.At the same time I am feeling tired from pushing the bike through the city traffic. Soon,I am aching,cold and my visor has totally misted up and the traffic is chaos!I'm doing 70 and I'm the slowest vehicle by far . I turn off the motorway when I see a services sign and end up tracking off some side road by mistake ending up in an Industrial estate some 3 miles later.I pull over, jump off and stretch my now weary aching legs and try to bring some life back into my fingers.I try to clean the visor but have nothing useful,so make a mental note to get some "demister fluid" for future reference. All the time,I am careful not to let the engine turn off.I get get back on, select gear and prepare to move off. The bike stalls. AArghh >:( In my cold state I had forgotten to kick up the side stand.lol I cautiously pressed the starter and the engine kicked into life. :) I took off vowing not to stop for nothing 'till I got home.
Shortly after 8pm(set off at 4.45pm) I arrive home freezing, numbed out of existence from the very Icy cold wind blast on the M5 and stumble indoors.What a day!
...anyway, got picked up eventualy,tested the bike,shook hands and made the deal permanent! I asked how much petrol was in the tank,and he said £10. Cool,I can make it to the first M5 service station. But decided to go into Bristol to the nearest petrol station just in case. So, going into Bristol,the traffic is manic(5pm) and I'm crawling along in a 3 lane approach to a roundabout.Suddenly the throttle response is gone and the bike stalls.Oh great,I thought.Out of petrol. I then discover that the bikes reserve fuel stop valve lever is missing !
So ,I try vainly to start the bike, then the battery fails! Arggh :o!! I'm knee deep,in the dark on a busy junction surrounded by cars and I need to push the bike off road across 3 lanes. Cursing I push the bike(previously felt light ,now getting heavy)down the road then I hit a hill! Struggling I slowly wheel her up the hill,round a few corners and then I see a garage! I eventualy push her into the garage forecourt soaked with sweat and breathing heavy.I fill her up to the brim. Climb back on and ........ nothing! the battery would not recover! At this point I got off the bike and walked over to the kiosk to pay for the petrol and walked back.There was this van parked behind me waiting impatiently with driver and pillock passenger!
I again tried to start the engine but to no avail so wheeled the bike forward to allow the van to use the pump behind me. Suddenly the driver hoots his horn and points to the 2nd pump.At this point out jumps the pillock passenger who starts raving and ranting like a demented wounded bear.I stood my ground and told him to cool it.I warned him to back off because he has no Idea who he's messing with.( I am an ex military unarmed combat instructor). The driver of the van then attempted to calm his irate (future heart attack victim). At this point I told him to drag the pillock away before I lose patience. The police arrive and attempt to cool things. I walk off pushing the bike to the exit and got on the phone to the seller.Naturally I was angry and said"what £10 of petrol?" and demanded he come to my aid.He said"glad he got hold of me as he's got the tax disk complete with holder! :D
while waiting for the seller to turn up the van leaves the via the service exit, by which time the subdued passenger's probably came to his senses as he failed to keep eye contact with me,probably realising he's lucky to have walked off! Anyway, he's probably got a family and kids!Absoltely pathetic and a sign of the stress that driving causes to "normal"people.
Shortly later, the seller turns up and we're pushing the bike up and down, and after 5 attempts the bike roars into life! I take the tax disk off him and put it in my pocket! I then said I'm lost so can he show me the way to the M5 junction?
No problems, and takes off in the manic rush hour traffic. I follow him and then he goes and jumps red lights!"Oh thanks mate! So, instead of waiting for me he's gone and I'm left going round the next few large roundabouts round and round and round looking for an exit that offers a glimmer of hope to where the M5 may be. I take a calculated guess and promptly head off where the traffic seems to be going and there's the glorious M5 junction. I hit the motorway and settle off for the 100 odd miles home. After half an hour I'm thinking"glad I don't live in a city with all that chaos and anger, and so glad I did not floor that wally as it would have meant me having to return for a court appearance and I'm sqeaky clean! :)
Shortly after I realise that my gloves were never designed for this extreme cold and I lose all feeling in my fingers.At the same time I am feeling tired from pushing the bike through the city traffic. Soon,I am aching,cold and my visor has totally misted up and the traffic is chaos!I'm doing 70 and I'm the slowest vehicle by far . I turn off the motorway when I see a services sign and end up tracking off some side road by mistake ending up in an Industrial estate some 3 miles later.I pull over, jump off and stretch my now weary aching legs and try to bring some life back into my fingers.I try to clean the visor but have nothing useful,so make a mental note to get some "demister fluid" for future reference. All the time,I am careful not to let the engine turn off.I get get back on, select gear and prepare to move off. The bike stalls. AArghh >:( In my cold state I had forgotten to kick up the side stand.lol I cautiously pressed the starter and the engine kicked into life. :) I took off vowing not to stop for nothing 'till I got home.
Shortly after 8pm(set off at 4.45pm) I arrive home freezing, numbed out of existence from the very Icy cold wind blast on the M5 and stumble indoors.What a day!