Boredom

[R1chie]

I'm bored

someone entertain me please

[Icey]

I just feel like complete and utter ****e :-[

You need Robbie Williams.......

[R1chie]

you're not going to start singing are you?

[evilkeneval]

Sleeping is good for reliving bordoem!

[R1chie]

i don't want to relive boredom though :


cmon...............jokes........funny stories..........entertain me godamnit!!

[evilkeneval]

i could sing, but i don't think you'd want that! :-X

[blurbiker247]

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks for their orders.The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a
coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"

"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. That will be £9.40
please," she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the
exact amount for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says , "A
hamburger, fries, and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact amount.

For a while this becomes routine until the two enter again later in the
week. "The usual?" asks the waitress.
No, this time it's a treat, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and
salad," says the man.Yep! Same," says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be £32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact amount out of his pocket and places it on
the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer."Excuse me, sir. How
do you manage to always come up with the exact money from your pocket every
time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was clearing the attic and found
an old lamp.. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.

My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put
my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a couple
of million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for
as long as you live!"

"That's right. Whether it's a pint of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money
is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a tall bird with
a big arse and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

[R1chie]

oh ****.............what have i done!!!

[evilkeneval]

lol nice

[blurbiker247]

Let me entertian you,...lar lar lar
A burglar broke into a house one night.

He shone his torch around, looking for valuables and when he picked up a
CD player to place in
his swag bag, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark
saying........"Jesus is watching you."

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked off his torch and froze.

When he heard nothing else, he shook his head, promised himself a
holiday, then clicked his torch on and resumed searching for more
valuables.

Just as he pulled a stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear
as a bell he heard,

"Jesus is watching you."

Freaked out, he shone his torch around frantically, looking for the
source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room, his light came to rest on a parrot.

"Did you say that?" He hissed at the parrot.

"Yes," the parrot confessed, then it squawked, "I am trying to warn
you."

The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, eh? Who in the world are you to warn ME?"

"Moses," replied the parrot.

"Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird
Moses?"

The parrot said, "The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler.
'Jesus.'"