Hi Billy et al....
I'm happy to help and I promise to only make one plug for my website:
www.TipsForDating.co.uk
This is a popular post and perhaps the management team would consider me having a regular editorial spot?? We could call it 'self-development!'
Let me look at your email again........you stated:
"On a recent date, we seemed to get along really well, it was fun and she was chatty and sweet. At the end we chatted in the pub car park and I told her I'd had a really nice time and would be chuffed to take her out again. To which she replied that would be nice.
Then she seemed to disappear off the face of the earth. She didn't reply to my text messages or voicemails and after a week off trying I gave up."
Please, please tell me you didn't say "You're sweet" ??
I'm assuming not......
The way you end a date is incredibly important stuff. Especially if you’re doing internet dating and you’ve never met that person before.
In fact it’s fair to say that if you’ve had a great first evening with a date you can undo everything in the space of less than a minute with a bad finish/close.
In the course I promote; THE SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™ there’s a whole section on the close and what to do and it’s way too much detail to go into it all here.
What I will share with you however, is that you have to think of the end of the evening as simply a pause in the conversation. A pause in the fun!
Simply that!
Don’t look at it as a ‘gate,’ a 'bridge' to cross or a ‘hurdle’ to jump.
What most men want at the end of the evening is some kind of reassurance that she wants to see them again. It’s the whole ego stroking need that us guys have! (Roxy will know about this! And I bet she's an expert at exploiting this flaw in the male species!!)
So men say crazy/needy things like:
“Hey you’re really nice. I like you. Can I take you out again?”
This is so LAME!!
You may as well have said:
“I like you, can you do my ironing and I’m going to introduce you to my mother!”
For a woman this 100% unattractive and her emotions are going to reject you.
Remember, attraction is not something that a girl can switch on and off. It’s either there and she’s attracted to you, or it isn’t, and she can’t wait to finish the date and go home!
At the end of the date think of it as merely a pause in the conversation. Something that’s going to be continued at another time…..
A cool, confident and cheeky guy would end the evening with:
“Hey tonight was fun, I’ll drop you a text when I get a chance and you can let me know which Michelin star restaurant you want to take me to later in the week.”
You’ve got to smile as you say it.
It say’s you’re confident, fun and NOT desperate or needy!
Small steps my friend, but do this next time and you’re 100 times more likely to get a second date.
By the way, if anyone else wants some specific advice I suggest you post it here or email me at callum@tipsfordating.co.uk
It remains anonymous if you email me directly.
Weather lloks good for the weekend so I hope to see some of you guys out on the bikes!
Callum
www.TipsForDating.co.uk
